Rangers rescue adorable seal in thong bikini

Keep your thong bikinis on people, or else it could choke a baby seal.


Losing your bikini bottoms in the ocean isn’t just embarrassing/sexy — it’s also a potential ecological hazard, apparently. Just ask this young seal, except he WON’T ANSWER because he’s got his THROAT stuck in a G-STRING. (Also seals can’t talk.)

A local man spotted the seal on a New Zealand beach, hanging out near a natural arch called Lover’s Leap — so I guess it’s no mystery where the unattended thong came from. He called the Department of Conservation, and marine rangers hurried to the afflicted animal’s side. Ranger Jim Fyfe says it’s not clear the seal was in serious danger — “Quite possibly, given that it was fabric, it would have rotted off, but you can never tell” — but they also weren’t going to mess around. “We usually don’t have a second chance when people see things; if we leave it any length of time, the animal…

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